rocking out to some old school tori amos is a great way to begin the day (cornflake girl, playboy mommy) and relevant for liz's internet searches yesterday, jackie's strength. her concerts have been some of my favorite of my life, especially with ben folds and rufus wainwright. SO MUCH TORI.
My least favorite website of all time is this one, if only because it's resulted in my officemate rolling around on the ground several times over the past few days. i'd highly recommend putting fake grad program results on there, as i'm planning on doing. why yes, i did get full funding and a very nice package from stanford, thankyouverymuch. also, here's for umich and not california! a squared what what! so much cooler! and with a caitybeth and arie too, and a justin to boot!
I really like the new theme that i've got for the blog: totally hideous stuff found on etsy.
Like this, a sweater targetted towards a very specific person. and here's the song you'd have to listen to while wearing it.
Not completely related, but what is barbie wearing here? well, i guess it becomes clearer upon looking at this person's other products.
ew. this is a freaky thing. i do not think the bunny is cute.
17 February 2012
16 February 2012
DAY NINETY FOUR POST THREE
Apparently, this is called hypercorrection (though i think that it's just poor editing and conjugation problems):
"She was one of those women who were interesting."
Hypercorrection is interesting because it relates to one of my favorite tales, told by a famous doctor.
INSPIRED BY Homemade hilarity, and continually underwhelmed by what must be the worst Danielle Steel novel of all time, I present for you today:
HOMEMADE CRAP!
A donkey wearing sunglasses.
Some sticks poorly woven into a 'wreath' along with something that approximates - sort of - a heart.
I honestly have no idea what the hell this is supposed to be, but it frightens me. To the core. It does say that it'd make a great housewarming gift. I am just putting this out for all to read: please, please, never get me this as a housewarming gift. Please read the discription here (excerpts below) regarding some of her other goods, most as good as the... whatever... above.
"She was one of those women who were interesting."
Hypercorrection is interesting because it relates to one of my favorite tales, told by a famous doctor.
INSPIRED BY Homemade hilarity, and continually underwhelmed by what must be the worst Danielle Steel novel of all time, I present for you today:
HOMEMADE CRAP!
A donkey wearing sunglasses.
Some sticks poorly woven into a 'wreath' along with something that approximates - sort of - a heart.
I honestly have no idea what the hell this is supposed to be, but it frightens me. To the core. It does say that it'd make a great housewarming gift. I am just putting this out for all to read: please, please, never get me this as a housewarming gift. Please read the discription here (excerpts below) regarding some of her other goods, most as good as the... whatever... above.
can put anything on top of a cup cake..
Any color icing or cup cake liner..check,stripes,flowers polka dots,etc.
Flags..no flags..names on flags anything on the flags.. wedding dates..birth dates
Solid flags no stripes..fruit on top
Handmade sprinkles ..glitter
DAY NINETY FOUR POST TWO
Charlie's going to meet the woman who will help change him from a TOXIC BACHELOR into a whipped yet happy husband. How do I know this? Let the excerpt give it away:
"From what he'd read of her, she was an impressive young woman, and the only other thing he knew about her was that she was thirty-four years old. He had no idea what she looked like, and had only spoken to her on teh phone. She had been professional and businesslike, but had sounded kind and warm... She was young, but allegedly capable... No matter how well trained and capable she was, she also had some powerful connections... He noticed a sign inviting neighborhood women to come to a group twice a week, to talk about preventing child abuse."
Note that Charlie's the one who wants a high society woman to stay at home -- BUT DOES HE????? I suspect this spitfire of an obviously well-heeled woman will change his mind! And this is coming off of Gray FINALLY falling for a woman who's not clinically insane (my question is why Gray pays for all the womens' therapy, while apparently not recognizing the he himself had some sort of mental illness where he was attracted to completely insane women).
Please also notice the unnecessary comma in the excerpt, along with the rather improper use of the word 'but' in the description of the youthful community center leader. Oh god, and it gets worse, particularly in the punctuation department (and becomes clear he's gotta get with her):
"She looked as though she should have been a model not a social worker."
"From what he'd read of her, she was an impressive young woman, and the only other thing he knew about her was that she was thirty-four years old. He had no idea what she looked like, and had only spoken to her on teh phone. She had been professional and businesslike, but had sounded kind and warm... She was young, but allegedly capable... No matter how well trained and capable she was, she also had some powerful connections... He noticed a sign inviting neighborhood women to come to a group twice a week, to talk about preventing child abuse."
Note that Charlie's the one who wants a high society woman to stay at home -- BUT DOES HE????? I suspect this spitfire of an obviously well-heeled woman will change his mind! And this is coming off of Gray FINALLY falling for a woman who's not clinically insane (my question is why Gray pays for all the womens' therapy, while apparently not recognizing the he himself had some sort of mental illness where he was attracted to completely insane women).
Please also notice the unnecessary comma in the excerpt, along with the rather improper use of the word 'but' in the description of the youthful community center leader. Oh god, and it gets worse, particularly in the punctuation department (and becomes clear he's gotta get with her):
"She looked as though she should have been a model not a social worker."
DAY NINETY FOUR
last night movie win!
nosferatu is "a classic 1922 German Expressionist horror film, directed by F. W. Murnau, starring Max Schreck as the vampire Count Orlok." I thought I was goign to dislike it, but it was really engrossing and I'd highly recommend it to everyone! This is particularly relevant because it was hotly contested as a violation of Dracula's copyright, and was being shown as an artistic protest to oppressive online and off line ownership regimes that work to stifle art. Very in line with the article I posted yesterday (Read through to the end) which is a fascinating look at the use and re-use of cultural products.
really, play sweatshop. it's kinda addicting.
google maps is the best. tru that double true. liz and i have been looking at google maps all day. i've seen more of the alpine themed gaylord than one would ever think possible, though i've seen it all in real life as well. and hold up! EGR's not part of GR charter township!
upon looking at the formerly veggie cooperative house bower, i now realize why all of our neighbors in the very nice whitehills neighborhood complained about us.
nosferatu is "a classic 1922 German Expressionist horror film, directed by F. W. Murnau, starring Max Schreck as the vampire Count Orlok." I thought I was goign to dislike it, but it was really engrossing and I'd highly recommend it to everyone! This is particularly relevant because it was hotly contested as a violation of Dracula's copyright, and was being shown as an artistic protest to oppressive online and off line ownership regimes that work to stifle art. Very in line with the article I posted yesterday (Read through to the end) which is a fascinating look at the use and re-use of cultural products.
really, play sweatshop. it's kinda addicting.
google maps is the best. tru that double true. liz and i have been looking at google maps all day. i've seen more of the alpine themed gaylord than one would ever think possible, though i've seen it all in real life as well. and hold up! EGR's not part of GR charter township!
upon looking at the formerly veggie cooperative house bower, i now realize why all of our neighbors in the very nice whitehills neighborhood complained about us.
15 February 2012
DAY NINETY THREE POST FOUR
wow, it appears that after a really, really great night's sleep, i'm a bundle of hard-wired energy.
ONTO THE GAMING REVIEWS!
I first heard of sweatshop through some sort of tv show I watched on a swivel TV in Zaid's combined living room/bed room. The game is quite entertaining and a lot less sweatshop-owner identified than i thought it would be. i get bonuses for not killing people!
ONTO THE GAMING REVIEWS!
I first heard of sweatshop through some sort of tv show I watched on a swivel TV in Zaid's combined living room/bed room. The game is quite entertaining and a lot less sweatshop-owner identified than i thought it would be. i get bonuses for not killing people!
DAY NINETY THREE POST THREE
an open letter to sonicWALL content filtering service software protection
Dear SonicWALL,
I know you first from your intrusion into the most well-researched blog ever, a two thousand page treatise being written by Liz DeLuca into the history of everything relating, directly or indirectly, to transportation. Called (Trans)portation: A Theory of Place to S/pace, it will be heralded by academics for years to come. Unfortunately, SonicWALL has other ideas, and chose to block "End Transit Racism" (Bus Riders Union) as pornography. I'd link to it, but we receive the following warning:
SonicWALL Network Security Appliance
Alert
This site has been blocked by the network administrator.
URL: http://users.resist.ca/bru.resist.ca/end_transit_r...
Block reason: Forbidden Category "Pornography"
If you believe the below web site is rated incorrectly click here.
Deciding to take them up on their offer, but on a website I'm personally a bit more invested in, I decided to click on facebook.com, which is blocked because SonicWALL alleges it is 'social networking'. This allegation - which I will not concede true - has led me to the page allowing me to view their various categories for blocking webpages.
Number One: Violence/Hate
SonicWALL, I'm disappointed in you. You've failed to block any of the websites I've looked up on "how to kill a person without getting caught" or "i hate jews" and even "kill all muslims."
Number Two: Intimate apparel/swimsuit
Seriously? Seriously? You're going to block UNDERWEAR pages? But I *want* to look at swimsuits and underwear, and possibly even buy them. You're not blocking boring guy pages (insert essentialist guy-activity like sports).
Number Three: Nudism
Okay, you've blocked one of the top hits for "nudism" on google. But don't you think this category is a bit broad? There's nudity in a lot of works of art, and it seems that merely having a naked figure alone would be enough to block most of the women's magazines in Turkey and Europe, and many art galleries globally.
Number Four: Pornography
Fair enough, but I'm still hesitant to call End Transit Racism a porn site, unless it's got some really oddball marketing strategies.
Number Five: Weapons
Weapons Universe isn't blocked, nor is the Gun Source. Other than possibly workplace violence, what justification do you have for prohibiting employees from buying weapons online??
Number Six: Adult/Mature Content
In a world with pornography, do you really need a separate category?
Number Seven: Cult/Occult
I'm not entirely sure you actually mean "occult." I'm interested in who gets to make the determination of what a 'cult' is. Is it a particular government? Is it YOU, SonicWALL? Is it your users? Christian Science isn't considered to be a cult, nor is Falun Gong, nor is the Church of Satan, and why the hell does Wikipedia have the Quakers (<3) as a cult?! And Bahai? SonicWALL, given the lack of respect I already have for you, I don't really think that I'll agree with your designations of what is a 'cult' or not. Number Eight: Drugs/Illegal Drugs Illegal changes by country, but fine. You've still failed to block Erwoids and ecstacydata.org Number Nine: Illegal Skills/Questionable Skills What are questionable skills? Does that include the ability to write a treatise on (Trans)portation? The ability to identify different drugs (addressed in number eight)? Also, knowing how to do illegal things may help you avoid having them happen to you! Number Ten: Sex Education This is taught in grade school, middle school and high school, but is considered to be too risque to be accessed on a work computer?? Isn't this the kind of thing that if an adult thinks or needs to learn about, they should be allowed, nay, encouraged to, so they don't think that the urethra and vagina are the same thing?
Number 11: Gambling
Fair enough
Number 12: Alcohol/Tobacco
Why? I don't understand the justification for this.
Number 13: Chat/IM
Jerks. Plus, I need this for my work sometimes.
Number 14: Arts/Entertainment
What. The. Fuck. Seriously? You block pages associated with art or entertainment? What. The. Fuck. Thank god it looks like not enough people have tried to go to these pages, so most of them are not blocked... or people are not such narcs that they rat out those HORRIBLE ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT pages destroying the very fabric of our society.
Number 15: Business and Economy
Business and fucking economy pages are blocked for a law firm? BUSINESS AND FUCKING ECONOMY ARE IMPORTANT THINGS TO KNOW. For instance, I regularly have to use 'business and economy' (and central banking) information to determine the value of currencies for various cases and projects we are working on. I have to research past or present economic conditions. Regardless, who's going to eschew work to learn about businesses or economies and NOT come out a better person?!? This is by far the most ridiculous category thus far.
Number 16: Abortion/Advocacy Groups
SonicWALL, I'm not sure if you mean Abortion Advocacy groups, or just abortion groups AND advocacy groups, but if it's the latter, lil broad, don't you think? And the former: I don't see you banning other sorts of advocacy groups that others agree with but I don't. That being said, if you really wanted to block abortion groups, you've failed to block NARAL Pro-Choice America. Nor does it block "prochoice.com", a website that contains such helpful information as: "Abortion... How much does it cost? The ultimate price, your baby's life, your self esteem and maybe your life." (though, of course, i've now used your helpful referral service to request an unfair unilateral screening of such objectionable content).
Number 17: Education
Education. Is. A. Blocked. Category?
Number 18: There is no 18. IS THIS A JEWISH CONSPIRACY?? The Hebrew word for "life" is חי (chai), which has a numerical value of 18. Consequently, the custom has arisen in Jewish circles to give donations and monetary gifts in multiples of 18 as an expression of blessing for long life.
I'm just going to list the rest here, only noting the ones that are particularly stupid, since from here on out, they're all incredibly idiotic:
Cultural institutions, online banking, online brokerage, games, governmetn, military, political groups, health, computing, hacking/proxies, search engines, email, web communications, job search, news, personals/dating (damn you! and just when I was stricking up quite amusing conversations with several seriously deranged men), usenet news groups (gag me with a spoon, is it 1989 or what?!), reference, religion, shopping, internet auctions, real estate, society and lifestyle, gay and lesbian 'issues', RESTAURANTS AND DINING, sports, travel, vehicles, humor, mp3s, freeware, pay to surf, KID FRIENDLY, advertisement, web hosting, and last, and most sad:
Social Networking :(
on the bright side -- as should be anticipated by SonicWALLs inclusion of USENET GROUPS -- SERIOUSLY -- USENET??? -- the ban doesn't apply to youtube or many of the proxy servers.
SCREW YOU SONICWALL!
UPDATE:
1. a) I found the category markings for SonicWALL's categories. Cult/Occult:
Sites that promote or offer methods, means of instruction, or other resources to affect or influence real events through the use of spells, curses, magic powers or supernatural beings.
www.phlums.com / www.terrificator.com
(do they seriously need to ban this?)
b) death:
Sites that depict extreme physical harm to people or property, or that advocate or provide instructions on how to cause such harm. Also includes sites that advocate, depict hostility or aggression toward, or denigrate an individual or group on the basis of race, religion, gender, nationality, ethnic origin, or other involuntary characteristics.
note that the website they give as an example doesn't seem to be that kind of site.
2. It looks like our network admin gets to choose categories to block. I know this because the drugs category includes such websites as hightimes, which we can still access (and hey, that hookah bong festerizer SHOULD have been on the cover, eh?)
3. I would like to congratulate SonicWALL for calling www.cdhh.org a "sex-education" website. The website is actually the Center for Communication, Hearing & Deafness. I'm a little confused how they think this is sex ed....
In conclusion, I hate you and your paternalistic bent. I hate you so much, and I'd like you to know that no matter how much you try, we at the office will still be able to get around you, if only to set up that meeting with the guy who's into Cosplay and said he'll come meet me with a real parrot.
UDPATE
and they blocked couchsurfing. hatred.
Dear SonicWALL,
I know you first from your intrusion into the most well-researched blog ever, a two thousand page treatise being written by Liz DeLuca into the history of everything relating, directly or indirectly, to transportation. Called (Trans)portation: A Theory of Place to S/pace, it will be heralded by academics for years to come. Unfortunately, SonicWALL has other ideas, and chose to block "End Transit Racism" (Bus Riders Union) as pornography. I'd link to it, but we receive the following warning:
SonicWALL Network Security Appliance
Alert
This site has been blocked by the network administrator.
URL: http://users.resist.ca/bru.resist.ca/end_transit_r...
Block reason: Forbidden Category "Pornography"
If you believe the below web site is rated incorrectly click here.
Deciding to take them up on their offer, but on a website I'm personally a bit more invested in, I decided to click on facebook.com, which is blocked because SonicWALL alleges it is 'social networking'. This allegation - which I will not concede true - has led me to the page allowing me to view their various categories for blocking webpages.
Number One: Violence/Hate
SonicWALL, I'm disappointed in you. You've failed to block any of the websites I've looked up on "how to kill a person without getting caught" or "i hate jews" and even "kill all muslims."
Number Two: Intimate apparel/swimsuit
Seriously? Seriously? You're going to block UNDERWEAR pages? But I *want* to look at swimsuits and underwear, and possibly even buy them. You're not blocking boring guy pages (insert essentialist guy-activity like sports).
Number Three: Nudism
Okay, you've blocked one of the top hits for "nudism" on google. But don't you think this category is a bit broad? There's nudity in a lot of works of art, and it seems that merely having a naked figure alone would be enough to block most of the women's magazines in Turkey and Europe, and many art galleries globally.
Number Four: Pornography
Fair enough, but I'm still hesitant to call End Transit Racism a porn site, unless it's got some really oddball marketing strategies.
Number Five: Weapons
Weapons Universe isn't blocked, nor is the Gun Source. Other than possibly workplace violence, what justification do you have for prohibiting employees from buying weapons online??
Number Six: Adult/Mature Content
In a world with pornography, do you really need a separate category?
Number Seven: Cult/Occult
I'm not entirely sure you actually mean "occult." I'm interested in who gets to make the determination of what a 'cult' is. Is it a particular government? Is it YOU, SonicWALL? Is it your users? Christian Science isn't considered to be a cult, nor is Falun Gong, nor is the Church of Satan, and why the hell does Wikipedia have the Quakers (<3) as a cult?! And Bahai? SonicWALL, given the lack of respect I already have for you, I don't really think that I'll agree with your designations of what is a 'cult' or not. Number Eight: Drugs/Illegal Drugs Illegal changes by country, but fine. You've still failed to block Erwoids and ecstacydata.org Number Nine: Illegal Skills/Questionable Skills What are questionable skills? Does that include the ability to write a treatise on (Trans)portation? The ability to identify different drugs (addressed in number eight)? Also, knowing how to do illegal things may help you avoid having them happen to you! Number Ten: Sex Education This is taught in grade school, middle school and high school, but is considered to be too risque to be accessed on a work computer?? Isn't this the kind of thing that if an adult thinks or needs to learn about, they should be allowed, nay, encouraged to, so they don't think that the urethra and vagina are the same thing?
Number 11: Gambling
Fair enough
Number 12: Alcohol/Tobacco
Why? I don't understand the justification for this.
Number 13: Chat/IM
Jerks. Plus, I need this for my work sometimes.
Number 14: Arts/Entertainment
What. The. Fuck. Seriously? You block pages associated with art or entertainment? What. The. Fuck. Thank god it looks like not enough people have tried to go to these pages, so most of them are not blocked... or people are not such narcs that they rat out those HORRIBLE ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT pages destroying the very fabric of our society.
Number 15: Business and Economy
Business and fucking economy pages are blocked for a law firm? BUSINESS AND FUCKING ECONOMY ARE IMPORTANT THINGS TO KNOW. For instance, I regularly have to use 'business and economy' (and central banking) information to determine the value of currencies for various cases and projects we are working on. I have to research past or present economic conditions. Regardless, who's going to eschew work to learn about businesses or economies and NOT come out a better person?!? This is by far the most ridiculous category thus far.
Number 16: Abortion/Advocacy Groups
SonicWALL, I'm not sure if you mean Abortion Advocacy groups, or just abortion groups AND advocacy groups, but if it's the latter, lil broad, don't you think? And the former: I don't see you banning other sorts of advocacy groups that others agree with but I don't. That being said, if you really wanted to block abortion groups, you've failed to block NARAL Pro-Choice America. Nor does it block "prochoice.com", a website that contains such helpful information as: "Abortion... How much does it cost? The ultimate price, your baby's life, your self esteem and maybe your life." (though, of course, i've now used your helpful referral service to request an unfair unilateral screening of such objectionable content).
Number 17: Education
Education. Is. A. Blocked. Category?
Number 18: There is no 18. IS THIS A JEWISH CONSPIRACY?? The Hebrew word for "life" is חי (chai), which has a numerical value of 18. Consequently, the custom has arisen in Jewish circles to give donations and monetary gifts in multiples of 18 as an expression of blessing for long life.
I'm just going to list the rest here, only noting the ones that are particularly stupid, since from here on out, they're all incredibly idiotic:
Cultural institutions, online banking, online brokerage, games, governmetn, military, political groups, health, computing, hacking/proxies, search engines, email, web communications, job search, news, personals/dating (damn you! and just when I was stricking up quite amusing conversations with several seriously deranged men), usenet news groups (gag me with a spoon, is it 1989 or what?!), reference, religion, shopping, internet auctions, real estate, society and lifestyle, gay and lesbian 'issues', RESTAURANTS AND DINING, sports, travel, vehicles, humor, mp3s, freeware, pay to surf, KID FRIENDLY, advertisement, web hosting, and last, and most sad:
Social Networking :(
on the bright side -- as should be anticipated by SonicWALLs inclusion of USENET GROUPS -- SERIOUSLY -- USENET??? -- the ban doesn't apply to youtube or many of the proxy servers.
SCREW YOU SONICWALL!
UPDATE:
1. a) I found the category markings for SonicWALL's categories. Cult/Occult:
Sites that promote or offer methods, means of instruction, or other resources to affect or influence real events through the use of spells, curses, magic powers or supernatural beings.
www.phlums.com / www.terrificator.com
(do they seriously need to ban this?)
b) death:
Sites that depict extreme physical harm to people or property, or that advocate or provide instructions on how to cause such harm. Also includes sites that advocate, depict hostility or aggression toward, or denigrate an individual or group on the basis of race, religion, gender, nationality, ethnic origin, or other involuntary characteristics.
note that the website they give as an example doesn't seem to be that kind of site.
2. It looks like our network admin gets to choose categories to block. I know this because the drugs category includes such websites as hightimes, which we can still access (and hey, that hookah bong festerizer SHOULD have been on the cover, eh?)
3. I would like to congratulate SonicWALL for calling www.cdhh.org a "sex-education" website. The website is actually the Center for Communication, Hearing & Deafness. I'm a little confused how they think this is sex ed....
In conclusion, I hate you and your paternalistic bent. I hate you so much, and I'd like you to know that no matter how much you try, we at the office will still be able to get around you, if only to set up that meeting with the guy who's into Cosplay and said he'll come meet me with a real parrot.
UDPATE
and they blocked couchsurfing. hatred.
DAY NINETY THREE POST TWO
on the heels of my previous posts about metaphysics and the ownership of ideas, i'd like to include a critically important book review.
BOOK REVIEW TIME!!
TOXIC BACHELORS BY DANIELLE STEEL
Random House Publishers (Transworld Publishers) 2005
This is one of the worst books I have ever read. It actually recycles sentences over and over in subsequent paragraphs. We all get it: Gray is a famous, but poor artist who goes for crazy chicks his own age probably from his own crazy childhood, Charlie wants the ultimate affluent stay at home wife after the traumatic death of every single family member he has but which gifted him his ENORMOUS wealth (he has a huge yacht!!), and Adam is still really pissed that Rachel dumped him 10 years before, though he really loves his two kids, and goes after dumb girls who are 20 years old - easy since he's a SUPER POWERFUL ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER!!!
Please cut and remix the sentence above there and get pages 1-50 of TOXIC BACHELORS. Add in some generic descriptive terms of hot chicks at restaurants (often topless!) and St. Tropez/other vacay islands and you have TOXIC BACHELORS.
Though I have not yet read through to the end, I'm going to predict the following:
Each man will meet a woman who turns what he thought he wanted on its head, and he'll find nearly instant love and happiness!! But it will be hard because oh my god was it what he really wanted because he is a (starving artist afraid of committments/woman hater because no woman is perfect enough and god damn a lot of them want to work outside the home/woman hater because his evil bitch wife left him over a decade ago)! Don't fear, in the end, the nearly perfect and much-better-than-the-man heroines will come along to change our TOXIC BACHELORS. All of this with some very bland and incredibly unreaslistic relationship-development-arches.
I highly recommend avoiding TOXIC BACHELORS today. And would like to remind Danielle Steel that although I understand there's some artistic license in the English language, she's gotta stop, using commas, for the hell, of it. And stop with the run on sentences, God didn't your editor say something like "Hey Dani, I think maybe instead of putting commas here, thus creating a run on sentence, you should put a semi-colon?" Given how terrible this 'work' is, I'd wager that a semi-colon would be offputting for the people who actually make it to page 100, where I am now.
ONE STAR OUT OF TEN
BOOK REVIEW TIME!!
TOXIC BACHELORS BY DANIELLE STEEL
Random House Publishers (Transworld Publishers) 2005
This is one of the worst books I have ever read. It actually recycles sentences over and over in subsequent paragraphs. We all get it: Gray is a famous, but poor artist who goes for crazy chicks his own age probably from his own crazy childhood, Charlie wants the ultimate affluent stay at home wife after the traumatic death of every single family member he has but which gifted him his ENORMOUS wealth (he has a huge yacht!!), and Adam is still really pissed that Rachel dumped him 10 years before, though he really loves his two kids, and goes after dumb girls who are 20 years old - easy since he's a SUPER POWERFUL ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER!!!
Please cut and remix the sentence above there and get pages 1-50 of TOXIC BACHELORS. Add in some generic descriptive terms of hot chicks at restaurants (often topless!) and St. Tropez/other vacay islands and you have TOXIC BACHELORS.
Though I have not yet read through to the end, I'm going to predict the following:
Each man will meet a woman who turns what he thought he wanted on its head, and he'll find nearly instant love and happiness!! But it will be hard because oh my god was it what he really wanted because he is a (starving artist afraid of committments/woman hater because no woman is perfect enough and god damn a lot of them want to work outside the home/woman hater because his evil bitch wife left him over a decade ago)! Don't fear, in the end, the nearly perfect and much-better-than-the-man heroines will come along to change our TOXIC BACHELORS. All of this with some very bland and incredibly unreaslistic relationship-development-arches.
I highly recommend avoiding TOXIC BACHELORS today. And would like to remind Danielle Steel that although I understand there's some artistic license in the English language, she's gotta stop, using commas, for the hell, of it. And stop with the run on sentences, God didn't your editor say something like "Hey Dani, I think maybe instead of putting commas here, thus creating a run on sentence, you should put a semi-colon?" Given how terrible this 'work' is, I'd wager that a semi-colon would be offputting for the people who actually make it to page 100, where I am now.
ONE STAR OUT OF TEN
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