30 December 2011

DAY SIXTY

fulltime got a break when a wicked something or other kept me home. but this is the LAST POST OF THE YEAR barring some sort of work emergency tomorrow. first, think i posted this, but it's a great quote and i lurv it:

THERE IS A PLACE I visit, where no one else goes. The rocks are slippery and sharp, the drop to the dark sea below makes me dizzy. The sun never muscles its way through the gang of clouds that hover overhead shedding a mist that plasters my thin hair to my head, makes me turn up my collar. No, you can’t go with me, I don’t want a sandwich to take, thermos of hot chocolate, though your asking may keep me home.

chinese buffet up in heeerre. second year running that the year ended/began with chinese buffet, which i've just learned is the cure to an upset stomach, oddly enough. wicked something or other take that!! meat patty explode the stomach!! "If you ever find yourself in Beijing and have a hankering for "ornamental doornail-head shaped pan-fried meat-filled buns and quick-boiled/fried tripe", a list of restaurants selling them may be found here."

It makes me sad when people cite false science as real. Ok, old wives tales and fake spiritual paths may have some placebo effect (which is good enough that doctors do prescribe it, especially in children with adhd), but that doesn't make it real. In Turkey, that comes out as things that we Americans find highly ridiculous - cold weather causing kidney problems, a breeze leading to paralysis, and so on. Last night, I learned that, very sadly, Americans have it too. Sigh. Milk does not affect your snot, and I cannot believe that you would think that.
We conclude that no statistically significant overall association can be detected between milk and dairy product intake and symptoms of mucus production in healthy adults, either asymptomatic or symptomatic, with rhinovirus infection.


28 December 2011

DAY FIFTY NINE

illness has struck the city. everyone is ill. everyone. and i suspect that i have been the latest recipient of this illness. so full time may not be full time today when i go home to sleep.

i hate these people. how many people can complain about not getting an iPhone for Christmas, really?

Read about hapax legomenons, words that appear only once in a context or language. Aided by Zipf's law, there's a prediction for how often words will appear in a context. It's one of the bases for scholars to challenge authorship of works, along with a series of other tests.

Are you poor? Fuck you. The year of politics, in your uterus (and in the US).

26 December 2011

DAY FIFTY EIGHT: SHIT GETS REAL - AYURKI EDITION

Shit got real when the person who put up an ad to have people kvetch to her for money found my blog. A very, very long and detailed blog post later, she has suggested:

"maybe you've done enough layering in your own life of past pain that you don't know reality from false."

"Everything I do is a way of life,not just knowledge gained by books."

"Maybe you have lost some of your innocence?"

"Each person has their place in assisting in someone's healing. If you are not familiar with holistic healing (working with a person as a whole, physically, mentally, emotionally, through the practice of spiritual principles)why comment at all?"

"You can cause unnecessary trouble with your posting and I would appreciate if you left my name and AyurKi out of your writing and focus on why this has annoyed you so much."

"Not having a license or being a non-practitioner? I'm not even sure why you would write such a lie. "

I challenge you, AyurKi lady, to demonstrate any sort of license you have.

It appears that AyurKi -- a 'spiritual' practice developed as a way of life with knowledge most certainly *not* gained from books didn't appreciate my review of her Craigslist ad.

Since apparently my first ad and cynicism directed towards it was not direct enough, let's discuss AyurKi a little bit more.

I'll keep it short and sweet because fulltimedoesn'tsuckwhenyou'vegotalotofworktodo:

Holistic medicine doesn't work. BAM. I know this is based off knowledge from books, but sorry. Beyond any sort of placebo effect (again: term from books), it. does. not. work. Perhaps I HAVE lost the childish innocence that was thinking that medicine is magic and magical 'medicinal' practices can somehow work. Until then, I still invite anyone who'd like to pay me to listen to them complain take them out to coffee. My own brand of psychological help developed after years of experiences allowing me to empathize with a lot and sympathize with a lot more:

Please note that such therapies such as Ayurki therapy have been developed by a single, unlicensed, non-practitioner. I have developed my own therapy, entitled "bitch, don't take no crap; get out of an effed up sitatuation; ain't no reason to worry about no thang; and you don't really need to be friends to everyone." It is supplemented by the "if you have problems, that's one thing; if you have clinical psychological issues, go to an actual doctor", which has thus far been completely successful.


DAY FIFTY SEVEN

OWS... ish.

love it.

23 December 2011

DAY FIFTY SIX POST TWO

link roundup to get rid of some of the open tabs i've had for a while:

Australia gets drunk, wakes up in north Atlantic. Oldie but goodie.

This post is apparently supposed to be funny. I think it's depressing and yet another indictment of the war on drugs.

who is a jew? the wikipedia article.

THIS IS IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE IT IS VERY IMPORTANT YOU LOOK AT IT. I want to do some of those, especially knit-bombing (or crochet bombing as it may be).

As featured on Neysa's facebook, christwire. What will the gays do next? One MI mayor is not happy about the gays either. Except she calls them 'the queers'. Please note that this website is called "Towle Road". I wonder how many Towle's there are, and if Amanda Towle is related to him? Or the other Amanda Towle? The name Towle has weird associations with it.

DAY FIFTY SIX

Today I find myself compelled to bring your attention to an important issue plaguing not just the nation of America, but the entire globe.

Sexual predators. This page used to pay the Law and Order SVU theme song but it doesn't appear to any more.

These sexual predators are a sign of the weakening morality of our nation. It is time that we band together to prevent such crimes.

I was assigned to find all the easter eggs that Google had to offer.

While doing so, I got distracted by Doodles. In particular, I love this one! There's also a ton of other fun ones, from playable games and a Mr. Potato-head-style Thanksgiving Turkey to some fun ones about people who I've never heard about before. Did you know that Calder invented the mobile? I had no idea. I always thought of him as "that artist who makes things out of big orange metal bits."

Beach themed iGoogle lets you sight the Lock Ness Monster at 3.14 every morning.

Google calculator lets you calculate and convert distances into smoots.

Google is available in such languages as "Bork, bork, bork", Elmer Fudd, Leetspeak, Klingon, Pig Latin and Pirate.

Google calculator will tell you the answer to life, the univerese, and everything, as well as once in a blue moon and horns on a unicorn.

Press Control Y in Picasa for a teddy bears.

Google maps will tell you to swim, jet-ski or kayak across bodies of water.

Google Mail spam folder features, not an ad, but instead, a recipe for something with spam!

Google search these terms: Santa Claus, hanukkah, kwanzaa, let it snow.

There's more and more and more and more, but that's all for now!

22 December 2011

DAY FIFTY FIVE

I'm only going to post one post today, because you better read it.

Rhet/Comp Ryan Gosling.

JAMIETRONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!

This blog is also dedicated to a shoutout to my friend Jim, who really needs to visit Istanbul. DeLuca lived here for over 2 years before I moved here, and then we lived here together for a while, and then she left, and then I lived here for over 2 years, and then she came back, and now we're all in the same city. All, that is, except for Jim. Jim has yet to visit, despite spending a great deal of time in the middle east. COME HERE BEFORE WE DO ALASKAN CRUISE 2025!!! 2012!!!!!!!! ISTANBUL REUINION TOUR!!!!!!!

21 December 2011

DAY FIFTY FOUR

There's going to be some yarn bombing here in Istanbul soon. I'll hopefully be involved!

This shapecatcher is pretty fun. Draw something and see what character comes closest.


Slab city, a trailer park utopia
. It actually doesn't sound too utopic, really, particularly the parts about theft. But it is interesting.

One teacher's approach to preventing gender bullying in the classroom. I love it, and it makes me hope/wish that all teachers did more of this.

20 December 2011

DAY FIFTY THREE

To resolve a debate we had last weekend, there are definitely more native speakers of Esperanto than Klingon, and indeed, more fluent speakers of Esperanto. Also, even if your mother is a human, it really doesn't sound that bad on this planet to say so.

Among those who are native in Esperanto are George Soros, while the one attempt to raise a child native in Klingon didn't work too well, including the lack of terms for 'bottle' and 'diaper' in Klingon. The most widely-spoken constructed languages, not surprisingly, are various programming languages. Boring. The other ones are way, way more interseting, like Volapük.

19 December 2011

DAY FIFTY TWO

Make sure to spread the word of a flat available, mostly after 29 December, with thanks to James Smart for advertising a non-existant room in our flat (3 yabanci girls looking for roommate), and hopes that he is able to find one for his via the above link.

Bill to ban insider trading suddenly very popular. Somehow not surprising that it's only popular after a very public expose.

Uhh... World record for eating a lightbulb.

Dishwasher wanted. Very funny. For those of you who I share my favorite links with, you may have read this before. Don't fear, though, over the next few days I'll post all of my favs from this person.

Woman refuses to move to the back of the bus.

I know very little about Havel but do love some of the things he said:
Twenty or thirty years ago, in the army, we had a lot of obscure adventures, and years later we tell them at parties, and suddenly we realize that those two very difficult years of our lives have become lumped together into a few episodes that have lodged in our memory in a standardized form, and are always told in a standardized way, in the same words. But in fact that lump of memories has nothing whatsoever to do with our experience of those two years in the army and what it has made of us.

I really do not like Christopher Hitchens.

16 December 2011

DAY FIFTY ONE

well, last night was fun!! i'm going to start going out in bougie areas a little more.

OH MY GOD CUTE ANIMALS OH OH OH!!

THE GOD OF CAKE AWAITS.
This is what happens when you try to get between me and cake - I silently challenged her to try again to prevent me from obtaining something I wanted. Just once. Just to see what would happen. It didn't matter how violently ill I felt, in that moment, I was a god - the god of cake - and I was unstoppable.

15 December 2011

DAY FIFTY POST TWO

me: yay
i took off eye makeup
and can thus sit here
COWORKER: it isn't the best one but it is ok
what why
me: the eye makeup looks way better in the full light
COWORKER: didnt it look good
me: i'll just put it back on
figured it's ok to practice
Sent at 6:30 PM on Thursday
COWORKER: yay
Sent at 6:37 PM on Thursday
me: duuuuuuuuuuuude
it's going to be sooooooooo weird changing here
COWORKER: ask DUDE for tips
Sent at 6:39 PM on Thursday
me: no
i am not asking DUDE for tips
HI DUDE IM GOING TO CHANGE INTO A SLUTTASTIC OUTFIT
COWORKER: hahaha
me: CAN YOU TELL ME HOW TO DO IT

Yes, indeed. Today I came to work wearing but a mild-mannered skirt and pink t-shirt (and awesome green forest boots), and I shall leave wearing some of my new clothes that I had left at various places, an actual pair of high heels, and a pair of tights that has fake holes ripped in it and a ton of makeup. SWANKY JAZZ DJ AND DINNER FOLLOWED BY VERY NICE SWANKY CAFE HERE I COME (ahh, the life of a yuppie). If it wasn't practically impossible for me to get ready eleswhere, I would definitely not do javascript:void(0)it: I felt weird enough walking 5 feet in just makeup, much less the whole getup.

DAY FIFTY!!!!!!

day fifty is the first post, i do believe, that gets its own set of !!!!!!s. ROCK ON DAY FIFTY, YOU'RE GOING QUITE WELL!!!

sad yall. afghanistan back in the day. sad yall too that the US was involved in screwing it all up back in the day with the cold war, screwed it all up with that little funding osama fiasco, and is continuing to screw it up.

i've had a ton of work to do the past week so you may have noticed that my posts are getting a little less link roundupy. i promise to remedy that because i think you probably all come here for a lil dose of ADD and i feel bad for denying you that right.

If I were a rich white guy: by a poor black kid. (Written by a rich white guy.)

14 December 2011

DAY FORTY NINE POST FOUR

Write for Rights tonight at LeMan Kultur. Starts at 9 pm. Come and assist Amnesty International and keep pressure on governments and/or individuals that keep political prisoners/violate rights (or, occassionally, governments and/or individuals that are hurting a group's rights).

DAY FORTY NINE POST THREE

OH MYGOD BABY SEAL

The desert's daughters, a study on brothels.


I missed this from the NY Marathon, but it rocks.

DAY FORTY NINE POST TWO

It's not a weasel, it's a martin, says weasel-weilding intruder.

13 December 2011

DAY FORTY NINE

FOR VARIOUS REASONS INVOLVING THE MAN TRYING TO KEEP US DOWN THIS PAGE HAS BEEN EDITED

some headlines from today's turkish news:

Zaman: The General Staff makes explanation about reports that soldiers in Edirne were given pork and horse meat: The army is not buying food from that company anymore


Hurriyet: Give my kidney back: Woman who donated her kidney to her husband files suit for divorce and asks her husband to return her kidney

Akşam: Cardiologist in Istanbul beats the anesthetist in front of the patient just before heart surgery

DAY FORTY EIGHT

turkey turkey! changing its mosques and everything, for the ladies.

turkish newspaper discusses the alleged armenian genocide. the readers respond:
I agree with the Turkish position regarding the Armenian and Turkish civil war.What the Turks should do is write about the horrors that the Armenians in Turkey inflicted in innocent Turks. I know families that have told me about their great grandparents being burnt alive by Armenians and or raped and killed by them. The World only knows the Armenian side of the story, it is time that the world saw the other side from the those Turks that suffered at the hands of Armenians.

and speaking of that, let's talk about the horrors that other groups have inflicted on humanity. i'm thinking mostly two of the worst here in turkey: kurds and gypsies. CURSE THEM!

david graeber: i think i'm in love.

huh. i was just looking at today's zaman and they've got a really disturbing picture of the Islamic Center of America (the largest mosque in North America, located in Dearborn). Dayna and I watched a rockin news blurb about Dearborn a few nights ago that I'll share when I have real internet access. It's the picture, on the side.

DAY FORTY SEVEN

Information roundup: Who knew that Nakusp had its own youtube channel??? Well, I'm now a faithful subscriber and will keep you all informed of the important promotional videos that come out of this riveting town. I also got to see the town's one (blinking) stoplight in one of the videos.

Boys will be boys.

SORRY THIS DIDN'T POST YESTERDAY BUT I WAS ACTUALLY QUITE BUSY SO DIDN'T NOTICE IT DIDN'T POST. NO FEAR, I'LL POST MORE NOW!!!!

09 December 2011

DAY FORTY SIX POST TWO

rocking out to old school liz phair and academic research is a perfect way to end this week. coming up next: boots (do you wanna find alligator cowboy boots they just put on sale?!), christmas trees, ginger bread houses, christmas lights, and finally resuming turkish classes! and friends visiting from america! and buying violins!

DAY FORTY SIX

oh damn! vietnam!

mumia got off death row. this news is via zizi. i hope he stays in prison for a long time. WHY NLG? WHY MUST YOU CHOOSE HIM AS YOUR PRISON ADVOCATE INSTEAD OF AN ACTUAL INNOCENT PERSON?? IS THAT THE POINT?? THAT EVEN THE GUILTY CAN DEMONSTRATE INEQUALITIES IN THE AMERICAN LEGAL SYSTEM????? FINE, BUT THERE ARE REAL INNOCENTS BEHIND BARS!!

there was a question about the scopes monkey trial yesterday at pub quiz and it made me happy! and i researched clarance darrow before for speeches that changed the world. i believe in the law of lurrrrrrrrrrv! brits and americans think radically different speeches changed the world:

brits like to fight on the beaches
, while americans have dreams. isn't it cute, the last time that country thought it was important?

08 December 2011

DAY FORTY FIVE POST THREE

world famous violinist performs incognito in a DC subway station, playing a $3.5 million stradavarius, is recognized by only one person, and is watched by only 7 people, total. he earns $32.17. the only ones to show real interest? children:
The poet Billy Collins once laughingly observed that all babies are born with a knowledge of poetry, because the lub-dub of the mother's heart is in iambic meter. Then, Collins said, life slowly starts to choke the poetry out of us. It may be true with music, too.

DAY FORTY FIVE POST TWO

filmmakers go to arkansas to create a documentary about three sinister teen murderers, on a fluke, from a person clipping a short article on p. 31 of the NYTimes. One gets death, the other two life in prison. Eighteen years later:

"I really do believe," Damien told the filmmakers in 2009, "these people would have gotten away with murdering me if it would not have been for what you guys did, for being there in the very beginning and getting this whole thing on tape so the rest of the world sees what was happening."

However, I'm not entirely sure that the GQ article adequately explained an Alfred plea or the implications of such. Basically, an Alford plea is someone saying that they are innocent but there's enough evidence to convince a jury that they did it. It came about because someone was going to be tried for a murder -- which he said he didn't do -- and, if he pled not guilty but was found guilty, he'd automatically get the death sentence. He pled for a lesser degree of murder.

This article mentions nothing of the impact of them pleading guilty to murders that -- the article seems to strongly indicate -- they would have been let off upon trial for. Send someone innocent to jail for 18 years? Bad. Especially bad in terms of lawsuits against the state. Sentence someone to 18 years, time served, for pleading guilty to murder? Not bad. Says the prosecutor:
Ellington inherited the West Memphis Three. He took office less than a year ago, and he was in private practice when John Fogleman told a jury that Damien had no soul. Defending those verdicts now, after so many years and so much scrutiny? Maggot sandwich. Get it over with.

"I had one shot," he says, "one lucky shot, and that was: Get rid of the whole case. That Alford plea was a gift. A gift to me."

Ellington smiles when he says that; the corners of his eyes crinkle. He has sandy hair cut in a boy's regular, and big weathered hands. He's personable and friendly and, in the early autumn, visibly relieved. A month earlier, he was preparing for the December hearing, expecting to lose but willing to go down swinging. And now it's over...

Ellington flat-out laughs. "You're asking me to dissect a case to justify my position, when, really, thus far I feel like I've been about as lucky as anyone in the whole game," he says. "I kind of feel like I came out of this the victor by not getting my ass handed to me."

I'm willing to predict there was a lot stronger case against these three than the article would lead readers to believe and that the sanity of Damien -- great name -- was not the only justification for the plea.

DAY FORTY FIVE

live blogging was made for this. all the sudden the sky filled with smoke, and we may get to evacuate work. gumussuyu autopark's somehow caught on fire and monique says it's visible from cihangir.

07 December 2011

DAY FORTY FOUR

If you only read two things today or this week, make it these:

The Symbolism Survey by Sarah Funke Butler in the Paris Review

and Settling the Colonel's Hash by Mary McCarthy, originally published in Harpers.

06 December 2011

DAY FORTY THREE

I didn't realize that the Trojan war may not be true. Luckily, modern belief is it kinda happened, but not in the grand scale originally written about.

word on the street is ikea has awesome christmas decorations. i'm totally going to get myself some of that!!

i don't remember this, but i was really young. historical things that happened on this day: man fights feminism by shooting women.

i just learned that nobody ate my cornish pastie and for that i'm SO FREAKIN EXCITED!

this is really interesting: what happens when adults are forced to take standardized tests given to high school students.

i want to see this documentary: playing columbine. i also want to see moral kombat, with just one question: is it turbo?

05 December 2011

DAY FORTY ONE / DAY FORTY TWO

so i missed one day of blogging because i was flying to/from ankara.

it is possible to be a police officer in the US as a non-citizen, but depending on the jurisdiction, it may not be possible or there may be a requirement that the candidate have applied to be a citizen.

horrifying holiday photo
.

i love the blog the final sentence. that post introduced me to the sylvia plath poem -- which i hadn't read yet -- and now love:

"I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan's men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead;
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)"

more cheery than edge, daddy and lady lazarus, for sure.

i don't know how i got into looking up freebird, but apparently it took over for whipping post.

monique dinner tonight @ parsifal. be there or don't have delicious dinner, unless you're at tv night, in which case plz grab my pastie from rachael's hands. please??

02 December 2011

DAY FORTY

good.is continues to amaze me. this one's via longform and is somewhat about some dude named max hardcore who i vaguely remember reading about for his criminal convictions before, but is mostly about a nice jewish boy.

From seattle weekly:
"Some monitoring agencies don't verify that a user reported to be sharing a file actually is sharing that file," Michael Piatek, Tadayoshi Kohno, and Arvind Krishnamurthy write in their paper, Tracking the Trackers. They conclude that "practically any Internet user can be framed for copyright infringement today."

NOTE THAT THIS WAS COMPOSED YESTEERDAY BUT THERE'S NO WAY I CAN WRITE A BLOG POST TODAY

01 December 2011

DAY THIRTY NINE POST THREE

OH MY GOD I GOT A RESPONSE TO MY COFFEE AD

Let's Do Coffee - a Listening Ear (Istanbul)

Özkan Kılıç ozkankilic@yes-english.com via craigslist.org to serv-xtfbq-271.

show details 5:55 PM (16 minutes ago)

** CRAIGSLIST ADVISORY --- AVOID SCAMS BY DEALING LOCALLY
** Avoid: wiring money, cross-border deals, work-at-home
** Beware: cashier checks, money orders, escrow, shipping
** More Info: http://www.craigslist.org/about/scams


> Hi!
>
> I am an English teacher and director of studies at YES English Language School. We need a native speaker teacher for one of our students in Ümraniye. He will take lessons in his office before starting to work (from 7:30 to 9:30) -8 hours a week -weekday mornings and the compensation rate is 35 TL/hr.
>
> Please contact me ASAP at ozkankilic@yes-english.com with your recent CV if you are interested.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Özkan K.


http://istanbul.tr.craigslist.com.tr/lss/2715431940.html


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[Busy] Maggie Ryan to Özkan

show details 6:13 PM (0 minutes ago)

Hi Ozan,
I'm not sure how good your YES English Language School or your English speaking abilities are, to be honest -- it should have been quite clear that my post was a joke, referencing another lame ad that immediately preceded it. As my ad made clear, I'm not an English teacher... I really fear for the students at your school.
Cheers.




i really want to start taking turkish lessons again, but, barring that (since i've been waiting for months for them to have a weekend one), french lessons. basically nobody wants to learn turkish on the weekends. apparently there are self-study books, so i guess i'll start doing that and report back on my progress. in the meanwhile, i've been looking up words i see around all the time. i should probably start studying at work too. i guess. if i could focus.

i have been having the most frustrating day today trying to remember which stravinsky pieces i used to play when i was younger. i seriously cannot remember!

still love longform and here's an article about the fascinating castle o death in chicago. i've read a bit about this before but nothing so recently.

DAY THIRTY NINE POST TWO

sent to me by naoufel. it's making me cry. i'm a sixth generation Iowan and an engineering student at the university of iowa and i was raised by two women... we just hope for equal and fair treatment from our government... my family really isn't so different from yours. after all, your family doesn't derive its sense of worth from being told by the state: you're married! congratulations. no. the sense of family comes from the committment we make to each other to work through the hard times so we can enjoy the good ones... it comes from the love that binds us. that's what makes a family. so what you're voting here isn't to change us. It’s not to change our families. It’s to change how the law views us, how the law treats us. you are voting for the first time in the history of our state to codify discrimination into our constitution, a constitution that, but for the proposed amendment, is the least amended constitution in the united sates of america. you are telling Iowans that some among you are second class citizens who do not have the right to marry the person you love. So will this vote affect my family?

DAY THIRTY NINE

time really flies!!

go canada. "we are truly sorry for our government's stance..."

this one's goin out for my mom.

former seattle chief of police says he did it wrong during wto protests, and so are overmilitarized police in places like oakland. it's particularly interesting: i don't think i shared it, but there were a number of articles about how the rate of crime is lower now than ever before in the US, while the number of police and funding for police is higher and higher and the abuses and intrusions of police are more flagrant.

and i'd never read yesmagazine.org, but it's awesome. fantastic articles, like this one about the military's failure to properly care for returning vets and the actions fellow vets are taking.

this is really sad. shaken baby syndrome.

this is a funny name for a charity: mom's breastaurant.